When i was *yourman😂* a child, I mean the period before my wandering, I thought that would be very nice if i wont go home before successful belongs to me, that would be no big problem if i left my home for couple years, i would get so much wealth, prestige, and achievements because what i ve done here. Would be nice if i do non stop working, everyday for 12 hours, saturday also for 15 hours, night shift too, taking a class at sunday. So why am i so serious with the days walk? Because my wandering couple years is for the rest of my breath, its my last time wandering, i wont take twice. It would be my secular provisions. Its okay then if it destroys my health and my happiness. Then day by day, the days feel heavier and heavier. Harder and harder. Getting worst. Then something come to me. Something remind idealist of mine. That is Parent. We all have parents that proud to having you all, no matter how ugly you are, how less achievements you are, how fat you are, how you become minority, pathetic, coward, anything you become, parent is the way where you belong. Anyone know that what your parents do if youre not around? Confusion. Yes, they exactly do. Dont you realize that they keep their misery about loosing their beloved son? Beloved daughter? Beloved you? They do miss your whine, your story telling, your "mom, a cup of tea please" screaming voice, anything what you always do, even your bad habits too, they miss you badly. They think that time runs fast, too fast. Yesterday you had to lift your head while talking to them, but now you have the same height. Yesterday, the house yard with full of firekrackers made your parent mad, but now its freaking quiet. Yesterday, you were just as big as their half. See, the time is too fast for them. They keep hiding their sadness towards your bustle, trying hard to smile in front of your video call, wearing all your clothes so that they can reduce their thirst, praying in the middle of the night about what you are willing too. The truth is they really want you to come back, like the old time, they really do, but THEY NEVER SHOW! Like they always woke you up to do five times praying, like scrambling a remote tv to decide what is the most proper tv program to be seen, and so on. Your father loves you, so does your mother much more. That. That broke this idealist. Even i am dying to deify the future, its not the way it is. Just go home, dont overpush your body, your time. Your quality time with your parent its self is very precious compared to your every single activity you do. Be on home, they are missing you so much. Youre no longer exist in the house, just make the house noisy again, untidy again, messy, like the old times. Just always stick close to them moreover you are 50 or 60 years old you will be. Buy house in the same town with your parent, stay close, stay around. They have massive sadness inside their deepest heart about your leaving. But they never show you. I just need to say why am i using english, long useless words, unparagraphed, as not intersted as possible, to express what i am feeling now, none of it to showing off. It is not. Just because i dont want my mother to know that i am talking about her now. She is expert spy in all social media you know 😁. Remind my words, just go home no matter how busy you are, gather with your family, siblings,friend, lover, anyone and tell to them, talk to them outloud that you will never at once leave them forever and ever. 😊😊